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Everyone faces disappointments in their life. I’ve certainly had my fair share. It happens all the time on the race track. It is disappointing when you are, for whatever reason, uncompetitive. There is a certain element of disappointment if you miss out on winning a race by a tenth of a second. It is mildly disappointing when you are leading a race and something breaks on the vehicle, forcing you to retire. It is doubly disappointing when you spin off when leading a race. Getting taken out by a dickhead when you are leading a race is even more disappointing. To be punted off at the start of the race by an ever bigger dickhead and losing a championship as a result is one of the most disappointing experiences one can face on the track.

Of course I’ve experienced all of the above. I was also disappointed several years ago when I lost my job halfway through taking out a mortgage. I was occasionally disappointed when I got dumped by girlfriends in my youth. Even more so when I was told it was because I was emotionally retarded.

Mostly when I face disappointments like the ones listed above, I may sulk for a few minutes but I get over things pretty quickly. I don’t see the point in caring. There are more important things in life.

One important thing I wanted to do was drive racing cars. I made it my goal to race competitively in a racing car by the time I was 18. Although I achieved this goal, I still felt disappointed. The disappointment was in the car itself. I drove a Formula Ford car, which is basically a step up from Karting. I was disappointed because it wasn’t fast enough for my liking.

I was also hugely disappointed when I did a skydive couple of years later. I expected that hanging from an aeroplane at 14,000ft and jumping out of it with little more than a rucksack attached to my back would at least leave me with a slight adrenaline buzz. But it didn’t. I found the whole experience rather boring and… well… disappointing.

Of course everyone gets disappointed by films, especially when they are hyped up so much. The anticipation is so high that they rarely fulfil the expectation of the viewer. For example, I watched the new Robin Hood film with Russell Crowe a few weeks ago and I thought it was the most god awful pile of tripe I’ve seen in several years. Of course, I don’t expect anything with Russell Crowe in it to be any good because I think the guy has less talent than a plank of wood.

Anyway, I digress. When it was announced there would be a documentary film made about Ayrton Senna, I was quite excited. I used to own a couple of Senna documentaries on VHS and they were really good. I surely couldn’t be disappointed by such a film.

I have to admit that I never really cared much for Senna when he was alive. Back then I viewed him much the same way I viewed Shumacher a decade later. Whilst I admired his talent, I thought he was a ruthless and often dirty driver who was reckless and prepared to win at all costs – even if it meant putting himself and other drivers in danger.

Nevertheless, after his death, I realised how much of an inspiration he was. Of course his death has basically immortalised him and he has become something of a legend since. A film about him was surely going to be epic.

To whet my appetite, someone bought me a Senna documentary on DVD. This was quite disappointing because it was an unauthorised documentary. I say disappointing because the term "unauthorised" basically means "cheap knock-off product that is attempting to cash in on someone else’s name and no one in their right mind will license it". As soon as I saw that word on the DVD cover, I knew I was about to waste an hour of my life.

Fundamentally the documentary appears to be some spotty kid's media studies homework. It is narrated by someone who really doesn't have the right voice for the job while a collection of vaguely motor racing related royalty-free video clips, that have little to no relevance to anything that is being narrated, get repeated over and over again on the screen.

There is virtually no footage of Senna and when the narrator gets to that fateful Imola race, there are just more random pictures of corners, none of which are the infamous Tamburello. The narrative at this point is something along the lines of: "On May 1st 1994 Ayrton Senna crashed and died. The end."

Anyway, after seeing that car crash of a documentary (no pun intended) I was looking forward even more to watching the official film. I was lucky enough to see a screening of it before it was released to the general public.

Disappointment doesn’t even come close to describing how I felt about the film. I expected so much more from it. I felt it lacked any emotion, any raw passion and it left me feeling… disappointed.

I think the problem is the film touched over his early life and mainly focussed on the rivalry with Alain Prost. While this is jolly entertaining because it was one of the most epic rivalries in sports history, I already know most of the ins and outs. So do all other motor racing fans.

It was interesting to see some of the never before seen footage of the driver’s briefing at Suzuka when Senna walks out but the rest of the film just felt hollow in my opinion. The climax to the docu-film at Imola just didn’t have much impact (again, no pun intended).

Something must be out of place because every other one of my many motor racing buddies who have seen the film have raved about it and claim it was very emotional. Some have even said they shed tears during the film. Either they are just big girls or I have got something seriously wrong with me. I’m sure there are some people who will want to bang my head against a wall (I’m really not doing this on purpose) for saying such things.

Maybe I’m not as interested in motor racing any more. Maybe it has been so long since he died I just don’t feel any emotion towards it now. Maybe the years have been more character building than I realise and I’m just mentally tougher than I realise. Or perhaps it is true; maybe I really am emotionally retarded. If that is the case, I find that rather disappointing.